It's been another typical day here in sunny Florida. Drank my protein shake around 0630 and took my morning meds. Then I sat around the mancave realizing what a fucking loser I am, and cried a lot.

Then I went for a walk. It's a beautiful day here in Pensacola, I'm a legal resident of Florida now, but I need to legalize my truck when I get a little money.

Shelby whipped me up some food before she left, which I appreciate. It compliments the Azalea routine that involves one drink at $4.50, great bar food for free, and a $2 tip to Brooke or Tina. Seven fifty for a strong cocktail in a tall glass, and a good lunch. Fuck McDonalds.

Normally on a day like today I would just get messed up and hit the bed early. But Jennifer, the lovely Pediatric Nurse, is getting into town this evening from seeing family in Iowa, and spending the night here.

Hopefully I'm in shape to talk to her, before she crashes for the evening in Shelby's empty bed. I have a crush on the lady, that she just endures, but I know she feels safe here.

I look around and see old men on opposite spectrums from me. I see men who have succeeded in life, have property and money. Then I see crazy people riding around town, bare shirted on bicycles, yelling at the world.

Then there's me. An old guy who was living on a deadend street in Tennessee earlier this year, trying to kill himself with vodka. I had no partner, just a few crazy friends, and no reason to continue.

But now, here I am, a broken man.